Childhood friend / Visiting Toronto one day

This Christmas I got to see one of my oldest girlfriends. She looks great! She's living in Toronto. We see each other maybe twice a year if lucky. This time we went two years without seeing each other but that was because last Christmas I was in Philadelphia with my parents, my dad was having proton therapy and she didn't come down this summer to visit instead her parents went up. I was thinking I would like to go to Toronto this summer and visit with her. Never been downtown Toronto ever before. Do you think its better to travel by bus or train? Where would you visit while staying in downtown Toronto? My friends mentioned Scarborough beach... let me know what you think.

Holiday time

So this Christmas was very hard for me being the first one without my dad. I'm glad it went ok but not as bad as it could have been. My boyfriends parents are so great. They really helped me get through this holiday. Im excited for the new year. 2017 I'm really going to try and be positive look at the good in life and people.

Sometimes your just depressed

Today is not a very good day for me. I'm feeling really sad and emotional. I attempted to try and do some art but I really wasnt in the mood. I managed to get 1 load of laundry but that was it. This is the first Christmas and New years without my dad. I cant believe he's gone, it feels like my family fell apart. I know that everyone else's choices are out of my control. Today I decided I really need to take care of myself. I need to stop worrying about everyone else. Dont you just wish you can turn off your head or like hit a mute button. I'm just so sick and tired of everything.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. 

LadySibby 

Endometriosis

Endo what? When I started this blog I knew I wanted to write some topics on this issue. Here's my first one on many more to come. When I first heard of Endometriosis was when I was diagnosed. I had laprascoptic surgery and both my tubes were blocked with endometrium. Many of you might not know what this illness is.So here is some awareness on it.

What is Endometriosis?

Its a growth that happens unexpectadley it can attack the uterus, fallopian tubes and in some extreme cases it can cause fertility issues.

What are the symptoms?

Extreme bloating, fatuigue, low iron, heavy bleeding, cramps that feel like your uterus is trying to kill you, back pain, intestinal issues, headaches these symptoms usually happen during ovulation or menstral cycle.

If you exprience anything like this here's how to get some help.

How to get help or advice ?

Talk to your GP or Gyno next time you see them. They can set up an ultrasound to begin. Later on if you need a clearer picture you can have laprascopy surgery the doctor is able to get an inside view and even try and burn off any endometrium they can see. Since both my ovaries were blocked he managed to flush out the left one, but the right one didnt budge. It's almost like the endometriosis wants to become cement.

I ended up taking hormone pills this summer to help clean up the endo with the medication. They were horrible, they made me moody and I gained so much weight. They did help with the Endo but only for a short period of time as it grows back. Currently there is no cure for Endometriosis so I would love to hear what types of techniques helped for you.

LadySibby

Last Full Moon of the year - Super Moon - Cold Moon

Super moon started tonight last full moon of the year and I couldn't be happier about it. New chapter of my life is on the way for 2017. This super moon is also known as cold moon. 

This moon is the highest and brightest one. There will also be a meteor shower which you can probably catch on telescope. 

In tonight Indigo session the psychic mentioned to do this. 

Close your eyes and think of a blue circle wrapped around spinning around the heart. 

One you have this vision in your mind. Add a second spinning circle around the blue one and this one will be yellow. Once you made the connection and feel literally at peace you can then draw it out to the universe it helps with seeing things more clearly. I will be giving this a shot especially with the power of the moon. 

Here's a little guide as to what to expect with the moon. 

Have a goodnight! 

Lady Sibby 

• Dec 12 - Dec 18

• 12
  Moon hits Bull’s-eye December 12
• 13
  Cold Moon at Geminid meteor peak
• 14
  Moon and Gemini on December 14
• 15
  Bright Dog Stars on December evenings
• 16
  December solstice starts shortest season
• 17
  Moon and Regulus on December 17
• 18
  Northern Cross upright in west now
• 
  

Sunday Funday part 3

Hey so as promised here are the pictures of the soap we made yesterday.  

There so cute, hope you guys enjoy them :) 

They are 100% handmade labels and packaging as well.

Scents we used : Tropical coconut, Pomegranate Vanilla, Coconut Shea Butter with coconut oil, Coconut Shea Butter with Jojoba oil, Green tea cucumber. 

Winter Wonderland*

                                                

Good morning take a look at what it looks like outside today for me! It's cold but beautiful. The dogs are not too thrilled poor Chico was neck deep for this mornings pee and Chika decided to use the pad today if she went out there she would be lost. I'm going to have to shovel a path for them in the backyard.I'm not looking forward to going out there later, but I am excited to go to therapy.
I love the advise my therapist has been giving me and her tips really do work. She's been really great and I recommend anyone dealing with mental illness to seek the help. I was hesitant at first obviously with Anxiety it's difficult to make commitments to anything as its a literal fear. I'm so happy I did it and am doing it. I literally looked up a crisis line that was free and 24/7 and then they guided me as to the therapy I would need and its covered free with our government. I was happy about that.

Todays plans
Therapy at 12:45pm for about an hour.
Cleaning -Finish my laundry-Clean hoard room at least for 30 mins
Meeting up with my best friend for dinner

**Psychic medium meeting special apt where I get to talk to my dad, i'm really looking forward to it not sure what to expect or how I get to communicate like does the psychic become him or is he the middle man (glad my bestie is coming with me). I have some questions for my dad but if anyone could talk to a love one that passed what would you want to ask them i'm open to suggestions please leave me a comment. **

Then were doing our Indigo course session it's going to be a late Monday night for me.
Especially since I didn't get to bed last night until 4am Insomnia sucks, stress sucks I literally have jaw pain from grinding my teeth horrible pressure feeling in the face. Learning how to deal with all of this. One thing I can tell you Meditation is amazing I literally youtube meditaion or guided meditation and listen to them.

Okay well i'll talk to you guys later hope you have a great day!
Stay Positive.

LadySibby

Winter is here ******

Sunday Funday part 2

So I didn't manage to take any pictures which I was super disappointed my phone died and my friends mom didn't have the right charger too bad. Don't you worry though I told my friend to take some pictures and send them to me so maybe in a day or two depending on how quick she will be.
So can you believe we only finished about 30 mins ago we made soaps and packaged them pretty and it was another great day. The Portuguese chicken place is amazing if you've never had it before you need to look up one in your area chicken made on a charcoal stove soo good!

My mom called me before she was really upset and missing my dad, I told her its okay to miss dad were always going to miss him but she cant get this upset where it was making her sick. Grief really sucks and only time can really heal wounds. So I just told her its one day at a time and if today was a bad day tomorrow will be a better one. We are aloud to have bad days, but just know there is a better one that will be on its way.

Tonights plan: Watch Netflix and Chill, smoke a J and pass out.

Goodnight until tomorrow have a great night guys.

LadySibby

  Pic of me and my mom we look like twins.

Sunday funday

Good morning new day trying to keep the positivity again today but its hard. It feels like I'm fighting myself and my emotions. I have a great day planned so this will help. My best friend is coming to pick me up soon were going to her moms in the city.

So todays plan is making bath bombs and soap for Christmas. We made some last weekend and we had a blast her moms kitchen looked like a science explosion we had the music going and we laughed the entire time. We had the best lunch ever too which were going to have a repeat episode today Portugese Chicken sooo yummy! Pictures to come come and see them later ill post them when i'm home. Heres some pics from last weekend! 

When your an Indigo

My best friend and I have been going to meditation classes with a couple named Paul and Ingrid.
Paul a psychic medium and his wife Ingrid a fellow Indigo explained to my friend and I that we were Indigo's also. So cool a title to how I feel in the spiritual world. We both never knew about Indigo's the more research I did the more it felt like me.

Here's a little back round on INDIGO's.

You may have heard the term Indigo as in color a purple blue hue. They also associate Indigo when talking about the Chakras its considered the third eye (ill post a chart with this post so you can get more of an idea) So Indigo adults are born usually between the years 1969 to 1987. They are super creative individuals, care for animals, may not have had the best grades in school but extremely intelligent, we may have a strong sense of psychic abilities or clairvoyance. Were rebellious adolescence and when we didn't agree with something we made our point clear we do not agree. We have deep empathy for humans and animals. Can see clearly from there dreams or have des ja vu a lot. Likes to be authoritative in a group setting or prefers to work alone. Intolerance for stupidity.

So pretty much in our sessions we are learning to really accept the special messages given to us. We practice meditation and aura cleansing balancing and last session we did feeling energy it was so cool we used magnets and then with our hands really neat stuff. Next session were learning transferring energies between other people.

Any other Indigo's on here if yes please leave me a comment looking for other Indigo's.

Tonights rants

Hey everyone so today was successful I managed to get some laundry done boring I know but it needed to be done :) I found two books to start reading : 1. Fear and loathing in Las Vegas can you believe I never read the book or saw the movie I started the first chapter and the writer Hunter S. Thomson is amazing! Hooked from the start I can see why so many people really enjoyed the story and Book 2 is Silent wife by A.S.A. Harrison more suspense story I believe but haven't even started it so I cant say much now. I'll post review on both books when i'm done reading them. Besides that I cleaned some of my hoard room painted a little more but didn't finish them so ill only post once there completed.

5 things I'm grateful for today

1. My dogs
2. My health
3. My amazing boyfriend
4. Feeling more energized to get some cleaning done
5. Left over pizza

When you love your dogs too much

Hey guys I wanted to dedicate a post today to my two babies, Chico and Chika. They are the greatest companions I don't know what I would do without them in my life. Each one with there different personalities. Every house is not a home without a dog :)

Chika Loves: 

-To be chased around the house

- She loves playing with her toys (especially ducky)
- Skiddish and will come to see you on her terms
- She loves to be sweet talked
- Loves when her friends come to visit
- Loves to bark
- Loves running around outside
- LOVES to give kisses and cuddle with mom and dad


Chico Loves: 

- Getting treats

- Getting his ears cleaned by his sister (well sometimes)
- He loves warm blankets especially the heated one.
- Loves summer
- Likes having his chihuahua friends over
- Loves mom and dad
- Loves to follow mom around the house
- Cuddling all day long
 - Kisses from mom and dad



Chika hates:
- Getting picked up without a chase
- The vet
- She doesn't like animals on TV (especially horses)
- When we have to clip something off of her like a matted hair
- Hates going for walks
- Will not walk on a leash like EVER independent girl
- Doesn't like clothes but will tolerate if shes cold

Chico hates: 
- The winter
- When Chika steps on him or over him
- When mom leaves the house (I always find my clothes in a pile when I leave)
- The vet
- Having his teeth touched
- Intruders


Chico and Chika's Chihuahua friends:
So here are some pictures of there friends we have Bella and Prince.
Photos 1 and 2 these guys are like my nephew and niece they come over and play together all the time. Best friends.

                                               

A new day

Good morning readers so today I woke up feeling extremely anxious must have been having a bad dream. I'm going to try and turn the day around to more positive.

Plan for the day:

Clean my hoard room yes my hoard room, since adolescence with my depression I always really had a hard time with cleaning and not throwing things away, but I'm getting there its starting to look more organized ask me three weeks ago and nothing would have been done. Today is a me day after cleaning and writing a little i'm going to meditate. Okay well talk to you guys later.

Hope you have an amazing day if you woke up feeling negative try and change the thoughts I know its not easy but just knowing in the back of the head your giving it a try makes things a little easier.

Talk to you later,

LadySibby

Beautiful Chaos

Enjoy the night readers heres one from r,m. drake I love his poetry.

Peace out Namaste

Ladysibby

Time to read a new book suggestions please :)

I was just wondering if anyone has a good book recommendations, I just finished the book the girl on the train I never got around to reading it and found the book way better then the movie!  I really enjoy self help books, suspense, Biographies. Anyways leave a comment, I need some suggestions a book you couldn't stop reading.  

When your friend gets a new boyfriend/ My new crystal

Hey guys so i'm just so curious why as girls do we get a new boyfriend and fall off the face of the earth. I don't understand maybe because I've been in my relationship for 10 years now? My boyfriend and I are pretty much like a married couple but never did we ever just stop hanging out with our friends when we met each other. Sure we spent a lot of time together but I still called and saw my friends all the time. One of my best friends throughout the 17 years of friendship ill see her then she gets a new boyfriend and were down to hanging maybe 5 times a year and maybe a phone call every three months. My mom recently with her boyfriend is in love land, like my dad just died for god sakes. Like mom you always wanted to hang out with me. Now your too busy for me or my brother and seems like your with this new guy 24/7. Maybe I'm just in a bad mood lol I don't think so though cause any of the close people I bring this up with doesn't agree with the way my moms acting. I don't know what to think. 

Tonights plan, work on my writing for a contest I want to enter you could win some money and free to enter so why not give it a shot. Gonna make dinner.. although I didn't take anything out and have no clue what to make. My mom and best friend have there Christmas parties tonight so its me and the babe and the dogs. Maybe ill take them for a walk later even though they hate walking in the snow this time of year. Especially Chico since its his first winter with us after being adopted in California hes really not liking the cold. I got a new healing crystal today it was the quartz geode. I'll attach a picture. There healing properties are great for meditation, astral travel, it works areas of the mind and body and it you can learn transferring energy it also helps with clearing the mind. I'm really looking forward to using it! 

Todays art

So I got really inspired when I was watching Bob Rossy on Netflix this morning so I decided to make a mini Bob Rossy painting and then two others just playing around with my paints. Its a great outlet for stress and has been helping me keep distracted from my depression. On the road to recovery. :)

Insomnia all day all night/Missing my dad

Well i'm seriously glad to have an outlet to write my thoughts out when im having these Insomnia episodes its been for weeks now I go to bed so late only getting about 4-5 hours a night. It really sucks. I'm taking meds and have an apt with a sleep clinic but thats exhausting too haha. Its funny because if no one even reads this I'm laughing at my own self lol glad I'm able to laugh in this moment.

I've just been crying for days now, I cant seem to snap out of it but I think it is normal too with depression and grief mixing together. I really miss my dad. It almost feels like he went on vacation for two months and now its time to return home and things to go back to normal. Wish that could be real but I know its not. Sometimes when I wake up in the morning I still think like oh maybe it was just a bad dream or ive been in some coma :* Its not true though. Grief is definitely one of the hardest things any human has to go through in there lives especially if its someone you were really close too. As you get to know me you will learn more about my dad too. He's always going to be apart of me. Even if it is just writing about him. I feel closer. Like I said in my earlier post of 11:11 I know hes around me sending these little messages. I can feel he is ok and that the other side is much better no suffering no pain. I hope hes running like Rocky now. When my dad went into the hospital we prayed with every single nationality to god to help my dad in times like those you accept all prayers from all back rounds I learned a lot from my dad during his hardest moments. He kept his pride and died a loving father and husband.

Ginger Candy

I have to tell my readers about this amazing candy I bought it at winners the company is called GEM GEM ginger mango so delicious and healthy for you too. No GMO vegan and fat free no trans fats gluten free made from Indonesian ginger kettle cooked. Honestly it even killed me wanting a sweet after dinner! There logo is "Jam packed with positivity" who wouldn't like these and if you have a belly ache these will help it's a win win :) Recommended to try warning not for everyone.

Visited by 11:11

So since my dad passed away I've been having these crazy number sequences and they stand out. It always feels like a message then is started happening all the time a couple of times a day. Then today I saw 11:11, 12:34, 1:01, 1:11, 2:22 and finally 2:34 at this time it was different I felt a strong presence beyond me or any explanation I can give you. But I couldn't help but smile look up to the beautiful Sky and say Hi dad its as if he hugged me. I know it was real and I hope others have received this as well, please let me know if you have.

Wikipedia says"
"Numerologists believe that events linked to the time 11:11 appear more often than can be explained by chance or coincidence. This belief is related to the concept of synchronicity. Some authors claim that seeing 11:11 on a clock is an auspicious sign.
 Others claim that 11:11 signals a spirit presence."

Makes you think

They say the early bird catches the worm, but what about the poor worm?

Music of the month

Hey guys so here is some music I wanted to share with you this month. All genres new and old. This is on my playlist now :)
















Mura Masa - What if I go?
Mura Masa - Love$ick ft A$AP ROCKY
Kanye West - Fade
J Cole - She knows
Jim Morrison - Crystal Ship
Jim Morrison- People are strange
Biggie Smalls - Suicidal thoughts
Odesza - My friends Never die
Odesza - Without you
Jai Wolf - Indian Summer
Pink floyd - Wish you were here
Led Zepplin - Stairway to Heaven
Puff Daddy ft Faith Evans - Missing you
Our lady Peace - 4am
Our lady Peace - Are you sad
Sia ft Kendrick Lamar- The greatest
Radiohead - Reckoner
The Verve - Bittersweet symphony
The cranberries - Zombie
Oasis - Stop crying your heart out
Johnny Cash - Hurt
Foo Fighters - My hero (acoustic)
The white stripes - Dead leaves on the dirty ground
Missy Elliot/ The black keys - Get your freak on
Parov Stelar - Booty Swing
Hayden James - Something about you
Chet Faker - Gold